Just some Poems

[ForgeBlade]

Hello all,
I need some outside opinions for a Language Arts project. I wrote a few poems for it, but can't choose which one I like the most, rip. Criticism and opinions are appreciated, here are the poems...

1.) Greed
Do the ends justify the means?
Tell me, Greed -
Is it something you really need?

No matter the price,
No matter the pain,
Would you endure all that
or would you first go insane?

Stop this madness,
Greed can kill
Is it all worth a higher status?
Or will your mind become ill?

The occasional want is good for all,
But when you have greed,
that's when you'll fall.

Like an angel
turned dark
shattered wings
falling apart.

Will you fall,
or will you rise?
Succumb to greed
And pay the price.


2.) (No name)
Why do you hate me?
I have done all I could
yet you shrug me off, I’m misunderstood
All you tell me to
I do
But you whine and chatter
with friends who were served to you on a silver platter
Spread rumors and gossip all day long
But hate is deep-rooted
And my hate for you is strong

I despise you now,
And you ignore me
why can't we just learn to be buddies?
Maybe we can turn this around
go back to how we used to be
But no,
your friends won't let you talk to me
I’m just lower class
You don't need to be crass
You treat gossip like birdsong
So my hate for you is strong.

You won't fight your ‘friends’
Now you're all about the trends
Why won't you come back to me?
I might not have money
But if you just admit that you're wrong
My hate for you could be gone.

Might write more in the future and post here, but until then, please give some friendly criticism. Thanks!

[MakuroMythos]

Your poems are really unique and your rhymes aren't forced at all, but have you ever tried free verse? I used to rhyme all of my poems, but I found that when I wrote without, the poems were sometimes more natural. I'd love to see what you could do with another structure!